Thursday, December 13, 2007

Boys without Girls

Fasten your seat belts. We are entering the Amazon. This Amazon does not have thousands of species; rather it has only two species boys and girls.
People like Dr. John Gray, Allan Pease and Barbara Pease have done enough research on men and women. They have missed the most interesting creatures on earth, namely boys and girls. They would have thought that in the future there will be a researcher called Na.Su.Krishnan(He..He..It’s meee) who can do stupid (read great) work like this.

Never mind..Let us get in to our job. In this post we will discuss about Boys who don’t have a girl in his life. For ease of definition, let us call them sages (waiting for nirvana).

These sages can be easily found in the following places;

1. In the gym, trying to build their muscles. Someone should have told them that broad chest attracts girls. Our sage missed to note that money is also kept in the chest pocket.

2. In Gtalk and yahoo messengers trying to find a girl to flirt with. Our sage should have missed to note that only those cases which are of no use in reality are left in the virtual world. All others are busy with their boys in some corner (Ya!corner) of the world.

3. In front of women’s college trying to attract some chick. Here our sage drives in an ultra modern bike. Sports black glasses irrespective of the weather, shirt which is torn in different styles to indicate fashion, trousers which allow thy underwear to show off (Jockey gets free advertisement here). Little does he know that our girls there are in need of drivers who can drive a two wheeler and leave them at home, nothing more.

4. Orkut and other social networking sites. Here you can see our sage having his best edited photograph (Reality scares) in his profile. He visits as many girls as he can in a day (Hard sellers) and scraps them by crushing his creative machine. “Hey..I generally don’t scrap unknown people, but your pic caught my eye. Couldn’t move without scrapping you. Can we be friends”. Intelligent way of begging for friendship right? Friendship is scraped, sorry sacred!

5. Along with boys who already have a girlfriend. Right! Your guess is perfect. “Yaar..your girlfriend’s room mate yaar..Sexy queen, please yaar ask her to introduce me to that queen. I will bring two old monks this week yaar”. Hmm..Bribe! Our sage can become a Government officer but never get a girl.

I can be happy only if the society is happy. I can not arrange girls for you (mind it, rascala). However, I know that you lose energy everyday by search marofying, trial marofying, propose marofying, line marofying, sight marofying and a lot of other associated activities like stunt marofying, sutta marofying etc., etc., As a boy-girl researcher, I will teach you a variant of pranayama which if practiced will help you to refresh, revitalize and get the energy back. The best part of this pranayama is that you need not get early in the morning to do this, you can do this anywhere anytime. Simple steps are as follows,

Step 1: When you are about to cross a girl, stand easy and INHALE……
Step 2: When the girl just passes away, start walking and EXHALE….

Note: The force with which you inhale depends on the beauty of the girl passing by. Best results can be guaranteed only if the place is filled with beautiful chicks:)

Disclaimer: This post is written for humour with humour by humour. Any species finding it annoying are requested to cool down by doing pranayama.

Picture source:http://www.flickr.com/photos/johnwiseman/

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

a lot of research being done it seems so sir how many have u implemented and how many of ur friends have tried it out.....
anyway a really gud i m sure all ll enjoy guys can try this but u forgot to mention one thing ........ try at ur risk ;-)

Unknown said...

Dear Thambi.....Hats off for your guts and carefree authority!! which i lack!!

Hip Grandma said...

You'll never be out of work.why don't you start a counselling centre.roaring business it's going to be.Good luck1

Unknown said...

@ Anonymous- Thanks for your regular comment. There is no such risk..U know girlz r good, they feel grt to see guys doing pranayama;)

@Arun- I do have guts because I have gone nuts

@Grandma - Seeing ur comment really icreases my post's worth. Btwn, Counselling centre..I have to face lot of legal and ethical consequences then..

@bonnie- Got your mail. I feel great!

rayshma said...

lol! awesome! :)

A comeback-roopeshrn said...

hehe..as usual fantastic man..

" frm rkd's diaries.. " said...

though sarcastic, i rather found it to be very entertaining...